Six years ago today, October 21, 2004, my brother Rob took his life due to HIV and AIDS related complications. He finally reached a point where he knew, if he waited much longer, the disease would immobilize him and he wouldn’t have the strength to go through with it. The lesions in his brain were spreading rapidly and were impinging on his capacity to function; he could barely crawl from his bed. He didn’t want to lose his mind; he had come to the last fork in the road. He witnessed loved ones suffer unbearably through the final stages of this disease. He wanted to pass in peace, in love, and in gratitude. Our loved ones deserve this, but that’s another subject.
During his final weeks, he shared with me his remarkable clarity to truly see. He described it as walking between two worlds; he observed all of nature, life and Being as one. His vision widened to reveal true revelation; changing darkness into light. Where he thought he had suffered, he realized he merely forgot who he was. Rob discovered the meaning of true love; loving one’s self to the point where love spilled from him into all he observed, everyone he touched and each particle of life. Finally, the blockages to love’s presence had been removed. Through his trials and tribulations, Rob learned the meaning of forgiveness which set him free, exposing his true nature; Love.
Love and fear cannot co-exist and fear must depart when love has come at last. Rob was not afraid; he was Love. Rob was ready to accept his fate. He knew he was not a body, he was free.
Rob left his memoirs with me to share with the world. Below is one of his final entries.
“Who would walk first to the light? We lose only the fear of the unknown. This would serve as lessons in letting go.
It’s not taken alone, it differs only in form from the walk we continue through this life and beyond…we take side by side one another with GOD.
And so it continues the Love we have known. One follows the other; and so we return; seeking the lessons from each side we learn; keeping it with us from this world and back home.” – Rob Ludwig
Keep Up Now ~ with the stream of higher consciousness and stay connected to the Source!