Putting Forth Effort
By Donny Winter
© 2013 Diversity Rules Magazine. All Rights Reserved.
Donny Winter is a gay rights activist on YouTube and recently graduated from Central Michigan University with a degree in English and Anthropology. He’s aiming to publish a manuscript of LGBTQ-themed poetry and write a memoir of his high school days where he was a victim of frequent bullying.
If you’re like me, you probably are a very empathetic person who likes to go out of your way to make other people feel worthwhile. It’s altruism at its finest. This is a particular recurrence when it comes to the relationship world. A lot of people will put forth a considerable amount of effort in order to appeal to an individual they are interested in. The unfortunate thing is that there’s an almost equal amount of people out there who feed off from those who put forth effort.
Empathy bolsters culture and society in the sense that through doing good deeds for one another, relationships form, which leads to a sense of stability amongst a population. However, that same characteristic is required to bolster relationships not by ONE person in the relationship, but BOTH.
When it comes to dating it is important to reciprocate the effort that another person puts into you, particularly if you like them back. Now I can attest to this, dating in the gay community has often left me without an individual reciprocating the effort I put into making them happy. Unfortunately the only remedy for preventing such difficulty is noticing three different signs in a person who will likely not return the love:
Sign 1: Lack of Communication.
Every relationship needs communication, gay relationships are not exempt from that.
Sign 2: No Consideration For Your Emotions
If you like somebody and they confide in you, you likely respect their emotions enough to listen and provide either advice or a shoulder. However, if that person pays no heed to your emotive needs that is a sign that they are not putting forth sufficient effort.
Sign 3: No Interest in Your Life Experiences or Triumphs
If a person does not respond or show interest in your life experiences that often implies that they won’t put any effort into getting to know you.
Relationships can be simple if you recognize the people who want to reciprocate the effort you put forth. While avoiding heartbreak isn’t always possible, it is often lessened by recognizing the signs of a person who refuses to show interest.
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